How To Make Love Last
By Anna Lynn Sibal
Is the phrase "Till death do us part" losing its meaning in today's society?
One could not help but ask that. It seems that nowadays, most people could no longer count on having a relationship that really lasts for a whole lifetime. Divorces and multiple marriages are becoming common, and many relationships fail to go beyond being just short term. It is getting easy to believe that permanence no longer has a strong hold in relationships these days.
And yet, despite the seeming lack of permanence in relationships these days, people still ask about how to make the love last forever. Is there a special formula that can make a relationship last that long? The answer to this question is yes, there is a special formula that a relationship needs to make it last long. The special ingredients that this formula contains are: honesty, respect, humor, flexibility, forgiveness and idealism.
Honesty. Honesty is about being open about your own feelings and sentiments about your partner and about your relationship. Holding back and withdrawing information about something vital in your life from your partner shuts him or her out and creates a barrier. When the barrier becomes stronger than the relationship, the relationship begins to fail.
Respect. Respect is a basic need for people. A person needs to know that he or she is being held with regard and consideration, especially by his or her partner, who is supposed to be the person closest to him or her. To show respect is to show importance to what the other is feeling or going through, and to back off when lines are being crossed.
Humor. Shared laughter is like the glue that cements the relationship together and keeps it stronger. Shared laughter means that the two people making up the relationship are happy together and are building happy memories for themselves. When the humor disappears from the partnership and nobody is laughing anymore, it is a sign that the relationship is falling apart.
Flexibility. A relationship is made up of two very different people. Each one has his or her own strengths and weaknesses and other characteristics that make the person who he or she is. It is not possible for two very different people to meld to each other all the time, and personality clashes are unavoidable. Thus, a person needs to be flexible and to make room for these differences in his or her partner.
Forgiveness. No one is perfect and everyone commits mistakes. Rather than striving to be perfect or expecting perfection in one’s partner, what is more important is to have the ability to forgive and to forget the mistakes that the partner commits, to learn from these mistakes, and then to move on. Without forgiveness, love can turn into bitterness and resentment.
Idealism. In today’s jaded world, it can be hard to believe that something as fleeting as love could actually last forever. If the two people in the relationship hold a strong conviction that their love will last forever and are doing everything that they can do to make it so, then the love will last indeed.